fredag, marts 24, 2006

Endnu en tegning


Nu trykker Jyllands-Posten en krænkende tegning af en ko. Så får vi hinduerne på nakken.

Årets tyndeste bog

  • Mine bedste vitser af Ahmed Akkari

Bird flu vs birds flew

Fugleinfluenza vits

Sjov ikke ..... he he

Sådan opretholdes et sundt niveau af galskab på jobbet

Efterlys dig selv i højttaleranlæget. Lad endelig være med at ændre din stemme

Hver gang nogen beder dig om at gøre noget, så spørg, om de skal ha' pommes frites med

Sæt skraldespanden på skriveborder og mærk den "INDGÅENDE POST"

Fyld kaffemaskinen med koffeinfri kaffe i mindst 3 uger, og når alle er blevet vant til det, bytter du straks om til espresso

På alle giroblanketter, du betaler, skriver du "Betaling for seksuelle tjenester"

Afslut alle dine sætninger med "i henhold til profeten"

Brug ikke kedelige tegn som komma og punktum i breve.
Mellemrustastenbørhellerikkebruges

Gå ikke - hop!

Hæng et myggenet rundt om skrivebordet.

Spil junglelyde på pc'en

Mindst fem dage før et møde ringer du og aflyser med begrundelsen "er ikke i humør til det"

Velkommen til forsiden :-)

Grønlands økosystem


Grønlands økosystem består af grønlændere og hvalrosser. Grønlænderne spiser hvalrosserne, og hvalrosserne spiser grønlænderne. Grunden til at det kan løbe rundt energimæssigt er, at der bliver tilført energi til systemet via alkohol.

Find 3 fejl :-)






Det er altså kun ment som en spøg......

Priceless

mandag, marts 20, 2006

Se mere spas

Se mere sjov & spas

Happy slapping - 12 marts

11 sagesløse personer, hvoraf de fleste var udlændinge, blev søndag aften (12. marts) ofre for et groft tilfælde af happy slapping. De 11 var angiveligt taget fra København til Brøndby for at spille fodbold, da de blev passet op af en gruppe store drenge, som bankede dem gule og blå, imens det hele blev filmet fra forskellige vinkler og sendt direkte i tv:- Det var modbydeligt at se på. Noget af mishandlingen blev endda vist i langsom gengivelse, sagde et tydeligt rystet øjenvidne.Gerningsmændene, der beskrives som veltrænede, var alle iført korte bukser.

søndag, marts 05, 2006

Jack Bauer facts - (ham fra 24 timer)

30
When Google can't find something, it asks Jack Bauer for help.
29
"The valley of the shadow of death", refers to anywhere within a 25 mile radius of Jack Bauer.
28
The Black Eyed Peas were just The Peas until Jack Bauer heard their music.
27
Every mathematical inequality officially ends with "< Jack Bauer".
26
If Rosa Parks was in Jack Bauer's seat, she'd move to the back of the bus.
25
Killing Jack Bauer doesn't make him dead. It just makes him angry.
24
Jack Bauer doesn't miss. If he didn't hit you it's because he was shooting at another terrorist twelve miles away.
23
Osama bin Laden's recent proposal for truce is a direct result of him finding out that Jack Bauer is, in fact, still alive.
22
It's no use crying over spilt milk... Unless that was Jack Bauer's milk. Oh you are so screwed.
21
Jack Bauer doesn't speak any foreign languages, but he can make any foreigner speak English in a matter of minutes.
20
All men are created equal. They are all vastly inferior to Jack Bauer.
19
Jack Bauer teaches a course at Harvard entitled: "Time Management: Making the Most Out Of Each Day."
18
Jack Bauer is the leading cause of death in Middle Eastern men.
17
When someone asks him how his day is going, Jack replies, "Previously, on 24..."
16
Jack Bauer was never addicted to heroin. Heroin was addicted to Jack Bauer.
15
Jack Bauer once won a game of Connect 4 in 3 moves.
14
Jack Bauer played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.
13
Lets get one thing straight, the only reason you are conscious right now is because Jack Bauer does not feel like carrying you.
12
Jack Bauer sleeps with a pillow under his gun.
11
1.6 billion Chinese are angry with Jack Bauer. Sounds like a fair fight.
10
If it tastes like chicken, looks like chicken, and feels like chicken, but Jack Bauer says its beef. Then it's fucking beef.
9
When life gave Jack Bauer lemons, he used them to kill terrorists. Jack Bauer fucking hates lemonade.
8
Superman wears Jack Bauer pajamas.
7
When Kim Bauer lost her virginity, Jack Bauer found it and put it back.
6
Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location of the keys.
5
If you wake up in the morning, it's because Jack Bauer spared your life.
4
Jack Bauers calender goes from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Jack Bauer.
3
Upon hearing that he was played by Kiefer Sutherland, Jack Bauer killed Sutherland. Jack Bauer gets played by no man.
2
If everyone on "24" followed Jack Bauer's instructions, it would be called "12".
1
If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd shoot Nina twice.